viernes, febrero 04, 2005

Observado

Si alguna vez estás en el vestíbulo de un hotel grande y empieza a sonar el vals El Danubio Azul, sal corriendo. No pienses. Corre.
Las cosas ya no se anuncian de forma directa.
Si alguna vez estás en un hospital y llaman a la enfermera Suárez para que vaya a oncología, no aparezcas por allí. La enfermera Suárez no existe. En los hoteles grandes el vals quiere decir que hay que evacuar el edificio. En la mayoría de los hospitales la enfermera Suárez significa que hay un incendio. El doctor Valdo quiere decir un suicidio. El doctor Conde quiere decir que alguien ha dejado de respirar.
Si alguna vez vas al Hard Rock Café y escuchas por megafonía que Elvis está abandonando el edificio, significa que todos los camareros deben ir a la cocina para saber qué platos especiales del día se han terminado.
Esas son las cosas que la gente te dice cuando no te está diciendo la verdad. En los teatros de Broadway, Elvis está abandonando el edificio significa que hay un incendio.
En un supermercado, llamar al señor Cañete equivale a llamar a un guardia jurado armado. Anunciar Llegada de mercancía de ropa de señora significa que hay alguien robando en ese departamento. Otras tiendas llaman a una mujer fictícia llamada Bárbara. Bárbara a la entrada quiere decir que alguien está robando en la entrada de la tienda.
El señor Cañete, Bárbara y la enfermera Suárez significan siempre malas noticias.
Todo esto es gratis.

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